Underwear!

I've been spending about 25% of my days picking my underwear out of my ass.

That's right. I said it! I am a wedgie girl. It's no secret. I'm sure all of you who read this blog have probably witnessed my retrieval of panties from within the depths of my buttocks.

It's not attractive, I know, which is why I have been on the hunt for something better. That's when I saw this on TV. Sarah Chalke is so much cuter with a wedgie than I am. Anyway, Hanes guarantees their undies will leave you wedgie-free or your money back.

Sir (or Madam), I accept your challenge! I picked some up today and I'll be damned! They work!

Thanks, Hanes! My butt and everyone who has to look at it salutes you.