How To Win Friends And Influence People

The "experts" out there will have you believe that their rules and books and step-by-step programs are what it takes to excel at winning people over. But there really is no need for all that. This, my friends, is your golden ticket to winning anyone over.

Olive cheese bread (recipe courtesy of the Pioneer Woman). It's food-gasmic. Food-vana. It's just damn good. You will shine at your next office picnic or pot-luck gathering and those who experience this divine creation will sing your praises. And who couldn't use a bit more of that?

I have been considering this dish for an upcoming event I am hosting and decided to take it on a test run at a small gathering of friends this evening. I didn't need to win these people over, they already love me! They were my unwitting test subjects from whom I was hoping to gain valuable feedback. There were no leftovers.

As I sat down to create my shopping list, I grabbed the first magazine handy to have something smooth and firm to write on. What an ironic choice. I guarantee this bread will do nothing for your waist line except expand it. But trust me, you won't care.

The ingredients are fairly simple. Two kinds of olives (black and those green ones with the pimentos in), green onions, butter, mayonnaise, a loaf of French bread and, the shinning star of the piece, shredded Monterey Jack cheese. An essential tool for the success of any recipe in this house is the purple squirt bottle filled with water, which keeps cat fur from infiltrating the process.

The completed mixture in my most favorite mixing bowl. I love this bowl in it's bright, sun-shiny yellowness. The most difficult part of this step was not eating every last bite of this mixture with a spoon. Because I easily could have.

Okay, I had a few bites. But I was able to successfully get the majority of the mixture onto the French bread, which was really the whole point of this endeavor.

While the bread is baking, take care to leave the dirty dishes for someone else to clean up, like a husband, for example, and go watch a favorite TV program or do some Yoga or something.

Actually, I did the clean-up myself. The husband was busy on an important project. I didn't mind.

Fresh out of the oven in all it's gooey, cheesy deliciousness.


Slice and serve to those who will be your eternal admirers. Or just keep it all for yourself. I won't judge.